Radiation day 9 plus dr's visit

Psalm 91:1-2 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadows of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.

Today was a busy day medical wise....first, I went to see my onocologist. My blood count is all normal for the first time --red blood count was better than when I first started chemo. Praise God!!! I found out that I will be taking the oral anti-estrogen (hormonal) medication right after I finish radiation. I have read about the side effects of that medication so not looking forward to taking it especially right before Christmas but I will be taking it for 5 years so might as well get used to it. I still have to see the doctor a couple more times when it's time to take Herceptin but then it will go to every other month. I won't be getting the blood work in between my appointments but only the day before. Yea!!! it's a wonder my vein has held up all these months. Because of my blood clot, they should really use only my left arm and so they use the same vein each time. It is so nice to know that things are settling down. After my doctor's appt., I rushed downstairs to radiation and got my treatment then went to the chemo clinic. Luckily,all of this was in the same building. I had Herceptin and they were able to infuse it in one hour. So far, radiaiton is going fine and I'm not showing any redness. I thought it might be turning some red yesterday but there wasn't any redness today. The PA did tell me that Herceptin will probably give me fatigue, otherwise not any other side effects. I was really tired today so when I got home, I quickly did a little laundry and spelling with Brandon then I laid down to take a nap while they ate lunch. The nap helped me get through the rest of the day but I'm already tired again and it's only 8 pm. I think the combination of the radiation and Herceptin is getting to me. I hate feeling tired but I know it is part of this path I have to cover. It won't last forever which is what I have to keep telling myself.

Last night I went to the Survivor Sister meeting. My surgeon (and friend) was the guest speaker. I found out all kinds of information that I didn't know. One is that there is no test to say that you are cured from breast cancer. There are some cancers like colon cancer that after 5 years, they say you are cured but that doesn't work for breast cancer. Breast cancer can come back anytime even like 18 years later. Of course as the years go by without reoccurrence of cancer, the lesser chance it will come back but you just never know. That means women that had breast cancer have to be diligent to be on their guard such as doing self breast examinations and getting mammograms. I have people asking me if I am cured or when will I have tests to find out if I my cancer is gone. I can say that at this moment my cancer is gone but I can never say I am cured. But, this is not a worry for me. I have put my life in God's hands and will trust Him completely. Whatever He wills for me, I will accept. I know He loves me and will be with me no matter what. Thanks for your prayers.

Isaiah 4:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

radiation day 7

Psalm 89:1 I will sing of the Lord's great love forever, with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known through all generations.

Today went better at radiaiton. I got there in plenty of time but they were ready anyway for me. Maybe they didn't have a patient in the time slot right before me. I was in and out of there within 10 minutes!!!! Wow, so fast. Still have no redness. I'm not too tired either so having a good day. Tomorrow I get labwork to see how my blood count is doing then I see the onocologist on Friday.

Remember my trip to DC? Well, the group that sent me there asked if I would write an opinion letter for my newspaper. They gave me a template to follow. I wrote out my story and then inserted the information about why I was in DC, etc. I am to send it to this group and they will edit it and then tell me what to do next. One lady had her article published in Newsweek magazine. Wow!!! Another step of maybe helping others and doing something that I've not done before. God sure is stretching me to do things I never thought I would do. lol. I was nice and didn't add the part of my first doctor refusing to let me have the MRI. No need to stir up a hornets nest in this town. The goal here is to encourage congress to preserve access to medical imaging tests.

Yesterday I received my last package from my chemoangel, Lisa. Thanks, Lisa. It was a great package but I know it's an end (a good end) to an era in my journey. She promises to stay in contact and I will love to stay in contact with her too. She was an 'angel' during my chemo treatments--always lifting my spirtits. My other chemoangel was a great lifter upper too. Thanks, Ann Marie. Thanks all to who pray for me. I sure need it to complete this journey that I am taking. Love you all.

Ephesians 6:10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power.

Radiation day 6

Psalm 4:1 Answer me when I call to you, O my righteous God. Give me relief from my distress, be merciful to me and hear my prayer.

I was emotional today or something for I was quite sensitive and had my feelings hurt by my 'favorite' nurse at radiation. I got there just about 2 minutes before I was to be there and she told me that I needed to get there a little earlier to be sure I have time to get dressed and ready to go at my appointed time. I have always been ready and waiting on them but this is the first time they were ready for me as soon as I was 'dressed' in my shirt gown. I don't know why that hurt my feelings but it did. As I was lying down on the table getting zapped by those radiation rays, a couple of tears rolled down my cheeks and I couldn't even wiped them away since my arms are up above my head and I can't move. I usually don't 'cry' at something like that even if my feelings get hurt. Oh, well.....I was quite tired this morning so maybe that was part of it. Larry hasn't set his clock back so he forgot and set his alarm to go off at 4 am instead of 5 am so it woke me up and I couldn't go back to sleep. ( I took a little morning nap today)

Today at radiation, it was doctor day. My doctor assured me that I will get burnt eventually. Oh, great......I keep praying and hoping that I won't get burned. lol. He said that I will probably burned a little higher too especially since it has probably been exposed to sun before. I didn't realize I might get burned that high up. So far, no redness.....yea!!!! He also said that I will be taking 33 radiaiton treatments. Okay, 27 more days. After I put on the aloe vera gel at bedtime, my nightgown gets stuck to my skin. That won't be good if I am burned. Will have to be sure I give it time to dry before putting on my nightgown.

Last night I went to a ladies group that just started. It's a time for prayer, singing, and reading scripture. I didn't really know anyone there but guess it's a good way to meet new people. The lady leading it knows who I am and her daughter works for my onocologist so I see her all the time. Anyway, she asked me to share what's going on in my life and where I am in my cancer treatment. We had prayed via telephone earlier for another lady who has breast cancer. As I shared with these ladies, I realized that God has blessed me by me having cancer. I wouldn't wish this on anyone but I do feel blessed. God works through whatever situation we go through and makes it into a good, blessed situation. I have drawn closer to Him, to others, and have been blessed by people I wouldn't have dreamed would be there for me. These ladies gathered around me to pray for me by laying there hands on me and praying. It was so sweet.

Today I visited with my friend that had cancer 3 years ago so I asked her what it was like for her when she completed her treatment. I wanted to compare her experience to what I read in the book I have been reading. Of course, she is still on treatment for she's on oral medication for 5 years and that medication has side effects so still has to deal with that. I will be taking oral medication too for 5 years but a different one than she is taking. But when done with radiation, she felt like celebrating and glad that was behind her. Of course, it takes time to recover. People think that as soon as treatments are done that you will be feeling like yourself before cancer but it takes months to really recover completely. So, my friends who know me, don't expect me to be the same as before. However, I really haven't stopped doing too much--just here and there I might not have done things so I don't think I will have trouble getting back to normal but of course, I'm not done with radiation either so maybe it will take time to recover from that. We'll take one day at a time, okay!!!! :) Thanks for your prayers and love.....

John 14:1 Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me.

radiation day 5

Psalm 106:1 Praise the Lord. give thanks to the Lord for He is good; his love endures forever.

I went today for my 5th radiation treatment. So far, no redness or anything out of the ordinary. I put on the aloe vera gel as soon as I got home. This week will be so much better schedule wise for it is more consistent. I did go in at 8:3o am today but the rest of the week I am to go at 9 am except on Thursday which will be at 2:5o since I am already in town on Thursday afternoons.

I was reading on the book "After Breast Cancer" from the beginning and it was talking about how many women find it difficult to adjust after treatments are done. I've never thought about it for I am ready to be done and go on with life. So, I'm glad to be able to read and find out these things so I can prepare myself. The author apparently had facilitated a support group for womnen going through chemo then ladies approached her to have support group for women after they were done with treatment so she has alot of knowledge from talking to women in that group. My time after treatment will not end so abruptly as some of these women since after radiation, I will still be taking Herceptin but only every 3 weeks. Of course, when that ends, then I guess that will be my end of treatment. However, many things she talks about like hair growing, etc. will happen before August. Somehow I feel that I will not be struggling when that time comes for I've been at peace through all of this and just having God guide me and close to me. I will have to ask some of the ladies I know who have gone through cancer to see how they handled that time in their life. During this whole journey, I just take one phase at time: first the surgery time, then chemo, and now radiation. I am glad I found this book, though, for it's opening my eyes to the next phase I'll be in. Most cancer books don't talk much about what happens after your treatments are done. Well, thanks again for your prayers and love....

Psalm 55:22 Cast all your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall.

Saturday

Psalm 116:7 Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before the Lord, in the land of the living.

Yesterday was a fun day at radiation---I walked in and there was no one in the waiting room and all the staff was behind the front desk getting their pictures made for they were all dressed in costume. It turns out that they dress up every year. My 2 nurses were Robert , dressed as Popeye, and Milton, dressed as a prisoner. They were in a fun, talkative mood. When I left they wished me 'Happy Halloween" and gave me a sugar cookie that looked like a green ghost. It was from a bakery and very delicious--even better than mine and I really like mine. :) I don't have radiation over the weekend, yea!!!!!

One of my biggest problems now is fatigue and chemobrain (memory & intelletual problems). The chemo destroys good brain cells too so people have some short term memory problems , fuzziness of quanitative thinking, and other things. It drives me crazy for I am more forgetful than ever before. According to the book I am reading, it says our mental capacity does improve gradually but not to what it was before cheom. Oh, great....The book also gives suggestions on how to improve the brain such as lots of reading, doing puzzles, playing games, memorizing things, getting enough sleep (lol), writing, and changing routine and learning new ways to manage things. Also, I just seem tired all the time. I took the boys this morning to take a pre-ACT test then came home. I swept and mopped the floors and was exhausted by the time I finished so laid down and took a nap at 9:30 am. The rest of the day I have been doing a chore then sitting down and doing some kind of restful activity whether on the computer or grading papers, etc. I am feeling pretty good right now so guess the morning nap helped. Thanks again for your prayers. Love you....

Psalm 105:4 Look to the Lord and His strength; seek his face always.

radiation day 3

Nahum 1:7 The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble, He cares for those you trust in Him.

Yesterday I had my 3rd treatment of radiation. I got there at 3 pm and there were 2 ladies in the waiting room. It turns out that the computer for the machine went down and they were behind. One lady in the waiting room was on her 33rd treatment and today will be her last. She said that in all those 33 days, this was the 2nd time she had seen someone else in the waiting room. She usually waits 5 minutes or less and then it's her turn. The other lady was on her 7th day of treatment and she had never seen anyone in the waiting room. Here it was my 3rd treatment and the 2nd time I had seen someone in the waiting room. I just thought it was the norm. Once I got in the treatment room, it didn't take long at all. They didn't have to put any wires on me this time. My favorite nurse, Kim , was not my nurse that day--just Robert and Milton but they are nice too. While in the waiting room, the first lady said she was on an antibiotic cream for her burns. Yikes. The 2nd lady told me that she wasn't red yet but has been putting on the aloe vera gel 3 times a day. She heard that it was usually midway before you notice any redness. I forgot to bring any aloe vera gel with me to town and here I was staying in town until 8 pm. I went grocery shopping after my treatment so I bought another bottle of aloe vera gel (figured I'll need another bottle anyway) and then I went into the bathroom at church when I dropped off the boys for basketball practice to put on the gel. I was able then to get the gel on twice for the day. My treatment today is at 11:20 am.

I went to the library yesterday and decided to look for any breast cancer book that wasn't there before. I found a great one for what to do after you are done with treatments. It is called "After Breast Cancer: A common sense guide to life after treatments". I started reading it especially where they talk about your hair growing back, etc. It says that your hair grows an inch a month and usually is curly like a sheep or poodle but straightens out more as the hair lengthens. The book says that the eyebrows and eyelashes grow back in faster and also hair on the legs and underarms. . I have to admit that it has been nice not to shave my legs or my armpits. But I won't mind doing it again for that shows me that things are gettting back to normal.

Gotta run, my walking partner just called and we are going walking. I will let you know more about what I am learning in the book in the next few days. Thanks for your prayers. Just pray that I will have the energy I need to get through each day. I am so tired these days but so busy too. Love you all.

Micah 7:7 But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for God my Savior, my God will hear me.

Radiation day 2

Romans 12:12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Things went smoothly for my second radiaton day. I had the same nurses--the guy is named Milton. They put the wire on again to measure the radiation. It read '5' but not sure what that means but he was pleased with the reading. I counted the seconds to see how long it took to zap me. Only 15 seconds each time. Wow---I'm there for a 30 second radiation treatment. lol. I was there for a total of 15 minutes. Not bad but then I spend an hour just driving to have this treatment. Too bad I don't have time to do things in town while there but I really have to rush home to finish up schooling with the boys, etc. So far there is no redness from the radiation. I felt some tingling sensations for a little bit but that is all. I am using the aloe vera gel so hopefully I won't get burned or at least not much. I am really tired today. I worked with kids at church which exhausted me but it was fun since I am teaching 5 energetic kids to scrapbook. Tomorrow I have my radiation treatment at 3 pm. Thanks for your prayers.

Galatians 6:2a Carry each other's burdens and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.